Since November I’ve been hooked on watching Will & Grace repeats on TV. A couple weeks ago I watched the series finale and knew I needed to write this. I’ve procrastinated, I’ve let it stew, but I think it’s time.
The final episode of Will & Grace aired in May, 2006. I never watched the series when it was on the air, and maybe my feelings would have been different if I saw the finale in 2006 instead 2015. But I have to tell you that I absolutely, positively hated the way that show ended. And I know that the biggest reason I hated it was because as I watched it on the television screen I was also watching the same ending unfolding in my own life and it sucked.
I don’t think it was possible to watch the series without imagining Will and Grace being close friends forever. Isn’t that how it’s supposed to work with best friends? Everyone always says that no matter what else happens in your life, you’re friends will be there for you.
Over the last few months I’ve written a few times about Dave. It’s fitting that he’s the one who got me watching those Will & Grace episodes in the first place. After all, he was the friend that would always be in my life. Maybe as a friend, maybe as more, but always there. And like Will and Grace, it appears that the time has come for Dave and I to go our separate ways as well.
I knew all along that a romantic relationship with Dave was a long shot at best. The catchphrase from The Hunger Games held just as much irony in that area as it did in the novels. The odds were definitely not ever in my favor. But I had no doubt in my mind that no matter what else happened, our friendship would remain intact. Until it suddenly didn’t.
Unlike Will and Grace, Dave and I have had no heated arguments or tearful fights. There’s only been stubborn silence and that empty void that exists whenever something happens in my life and I want to tell my best friend all about it, only to realize that he isn’t there anymore. No closure, no understanding of what happened or why. Just silence.